Is your partner triggering you? Expert says why this is a blessing in disguise

A partner who stirs uncomfortable emotions and triggers you with stinging words or other hurtful actions can be difficult to endure. In fact, the first reaction is to end things with them. Relationship break up, passionate matches fizzle out. Triggering partners, or anyone who stirs unpleasant emotions are avoided like the plague. But, this is actually a blessing in disguise.

Quentin Goyetche Decamp, a relationship coach, explained how a trigger partner can be a gift.

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Show the limits

As Quentin rightly put it, the people who trigger us reveal our limits. They expose the parts of ourselves we would rather keep hidden, the insecurities, fears, trauma and unresolved wounds we may not even be fully aware of. The triggers create an urge to outrun them because they mirror as Quentin, added, ‘the deepest shadows.’

Opportunity to be authentic

Quentin added that triggers reveal our ‘blind spots’, the aspects of ourselves where there’s a lack of clarity, maybe even being inauthentic to yourself.

This is an opportunity, to be honest with yourself. Additionally, it can also help develop a deeper sense of connection with your partner. By being honest, Quentin, emphasized, that healing can occur in a tense relationship, putting both the partners at ease.

Time to understand how you attract

If anything is triggering it is also a moment to recalibrate on how you attract. Quentin added that people sometimes attract relationships that feel somewhat similar to their childhood experiences. So, if they grew up with chaos, neglect, trauma or instability, they might unconsciously choose partners who recreate those feelings because it feels familiar.

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Note to readers: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional advice.