Men dying, men crying, who is listening? Falsely invoking dowry laws should attract penalty, demand Indian men

→•January, 2025. Puneet Khurana, 40. Delhi café owner died by suicide leaving behind an hour-long video where he claimed he was being tortured by his wife and in-laws.

→•January, 2025. Petaru Gollapalli, 40. Karnataka native Petaru died by suicide. In his suicide note, he alleged harassment by his wife and her demand for compensation.

→•February, 2025. Rohit, 24. In Uttar Pradesh, 24-year-old Rohit died by suicide alleging that he found it difficult to bear torture by his estranged wife and couldn’t fulfil her demand of ₹10 lakh.

The dream of marriage, a death sentence for many men.

“Atul Subhash is not the first person to die by suicide and he will not be the last if section 498A of the IPC is not made more responsible,” says Deepika Narayan Bhardwaj, director of Ekam Nyaay Foundation, a non-profit organisation (NGO) that fights and intervenes for men’s rights.

She became a men’s rights activist after being “falsely accused” of domestic violence, dowry and also threats of 498A (IPC). Her documentary Martyrs of Marriage released in 2016. It showcased stories of men who died by suicide after allegedly being falsely implicated in dowry and harassment cases and subjected to torture at the hands of their estranged wives. and there are thousands others who have lived to tell the tale of their tribulations.

First Person Accounts: Trapped by law, punished by process

Many men have found it easier to end their lives than continue fighting the “falsely invoked” section 498A (IPC) against them. But, there are innumerable others who choose to fight on, believing that their innocence will be accepted by the law and they can reclaim their lives. However, it is usually too late. Here’s an account of three such men who came back from the verge of suicide.

‘Accused my family of gang rape’

“On our honeymoon, she didn’t let me touch her. In fact, she ran from the hotel. The time that we should have spent discussing our dreams and imagining a happy future was spent in looking frantically for her. she told me she didn’t want to marry, but her family forced her to.

Weeks later, an argument over a handbag changed my life. It was a simple disagreement between a husband and wife. Or so I thought.

Later, her mother called up asking that her daughter be sent to Karnal immediately because of some emergency. I took my ex-wife to the GT Karnal Road, she boarded the state bus and I was there until the bus left. Then, I messaged her mother the bus number. Later, my ex-wife messaged that she had reached Karnal safely.

A few days later, we got a call from the Women’s Cell, Karnal, informing us that a complaint had been filed against me, my father and sister. They said they couldn’t read it out because the complaint was heinous and dirty.

We didn’t know what we were accused of, but we wanted the marriage to work. We reached Karnal and it was decided that she and I would live separately away from my parents.

Weeks later, again after an argument, she called her parents and they called the PCR and all went to PS Janakpuri. The next thing we know, police had came to our house and informed us about the FIR with numerous allegations.

Charges?

Gangrape.

Against me. Against my father. Against my sister. This was the second time they had levelled these allegations. The first time was when she had gone to Karnal after an argument over a handbag. You know how much that bag was? INR 600.

Then came more charges— Section 498A of IPC, domestic violence, and whatever they could.

They demanded ₹22 lakh for out-of-court settlement.

I paid 11 lakhs at the time of divorce and was ready to pay the rest too, because I wanted my life back. Our only request was that they tell the court the truth that it was a marital dispute. They refused after taking 11 lakhs.

And so began my decade-long fight for survival.

For 9 years, I ran from one state to another, contesting cases in multiple courts. I lost my business. I lost financial status. I lost years of my life. I was depressed and shamed for no fault. Eventually, the truth won. The Honourable court dismissed all charges and called allegations false and framed.

I had my own business but I became a lawyer to defend myself. And now I am happily married to a wonderful person who has a seven-year-old daughter, she is our daughter now,” says Advocate Vipul Gupta, who is based out of Delhi.

A 35-day marriage, 12-year battle

“On the very first day of marriage, we noticed she had severe spinal deformities: scoliosis and kyphosis — her spine was curved and hunched. They hadn’t disclosed this to us and when we asked her parents about it, they became hostile.

Anyway, I was sincere about the marriage. She and I shifted to my Pune flat, hoping we could build something real. Within 35 days of our marriage, I got transferred to America. The plan was that she’d join me there later. However, while I was there, my world fell apart.

Her father, mother, and younger sister moved into my Pune flat. They said they’d file false dowry case against us if we told them to vacate and didn’t give them monthly expenses.

And then, like a nightmare unfolding in slow motion, the cases started — 498A (IPC), domestic violence, harassment — filed against me, my partially-blind father who sold sarees in Surat, my elderly uncle who appeared in the court with an IV drip, my younger sister, my mother and even my boss! My boss, who couldn’t even attend our marriage, unke against criminal conspiracy ka case kar diya.

I kept contesting the charges and kept paying the EMIs and also money for regular expenditure. After eight years, when I couldn’t afford the EMIs of the flat where they were living, the bank seized my flat. However, even after 12 years, the legal battles haven’t ended. My dreams were shattered. I had travelled so many countries before marriage, but I couldn’t after the cases started because my passport wasn’t cleared. I couldn’t be regular at jobs because I had to appear in courts of so mnay districts and states,” says IT professional who is considering pursuing law to fight his own case.

‘They picked me up like a terrorist’

“I was picked up by police at 1am from an ICU in Bhopal like a terrorist. My mother was battling for her life, I was by her side. They threw me into a private vehicle and took me to Indore.

I asked them why had they picked me up like that. They said, ‘Ladki ko tang karta hai ab kitna bhola ban raha hai.’ I thought they had confused me with someone else. Hours later, we reached Indore, where I was humiliated more at the Mahila Thana. Later, I was transferred to the gent’s thana, where a constable slapped me across my face for no reason at all. I felt like an animal being paraded for slaughter. Abhi tak mujhe nahin pata tha ki yeh kar kyun rahe hain aisa.

When morning came, I saw my former mother-in-law there.

That’s when I realised I wasn’t there by accident. They accused me, my father and mother of dowry, harassment, domestic violence, and every crime they could think of. This was back in 2012, uss waqt section 498A (IPC) mein immediate arrest hota tha. The cases came out of the blue. The humiliation and torture… I still remember all of it. But I was innocent. I was an investment banker, an IIT Kanpur graduate. I was the JEE topper from Uttar Pradesh, I couldn’t continue to work because of innumerable cases that I had to attend. Then, I decided to fight my own case and eventually won after a harrowing fight. Today, I am happily married to a wonderful person and have two kids,” shares High Court advocate Deeptanshu Shukla, who lives in Madhya Pradesh.

Tool for Personal Vendetta: Supreme Court

It is the nightmarish reality of many men in the country where section 498A of the Indian Penal Code (IPC) is used as a tool for unleashing personal vendetta against the husband and his family by a wife. The Supreme Court of India heavily criticised the misuse of Section 498A (IPC), which was intended to protect married women. The Supreme Court has equated misuse of IPC 498A to “legal terrorism”. The Calcutta High Court also observed that this misuse unleashes legal terrorism.

What is section 498A of the Indian Penal Court?

Popularly called the anti-dowry law, section 498A of the Indian Penal Code (IPC) or section 85 and 86 of the Bharatiya Nyaya Sanhita (BNS) criminalises cruelty by a husband or his relatives towards a married woman.

What makes it a tool for legal terrorism?

The offence under this section is criminal, cognisable, non-bailable, and non-compoundable, which means the accused can be arrested right away without any legal proof or investigation. The accused are presumed guilty until proven innocent.

A cocktail of harassment

“Many women settle marital disputes by invoking section 498A (IPC) falsely. And it is not 498A alone, it is a whole cocktail of sections. The other laws in the mix include domestic violence, unnatural sex, rape by in-laws, and, if there is a minor child in the house, sometimes mothers file POCSO cases on behalf of the child against members of the family,” shares Delhi-based advocate Akash Krishna.

“My client’s daughter-in-law accused him of raping her 10-year-old daughter along with accusing him under section 498A (IPC). It was tried under the Protection of Children from Sexual Offences Act (POCSO). She wanted a higher amount of maintenance and a house. Can you imagine the shame and humiliation he bore to prove that he didn’t rape the granddaughter he raised so lovingly. He said he felt like killing himself. We were able to prove his innocence, but the social and psychological impact on him was unimaginable… There should be provision to penalize those who file false rape cases or cases of such sensitive nature. Right now in Gurgaon the penalty for filing a false rape case is INR 500 an in Delhi, ther is no penalty at all,” says Krishna.

“Once falsely implicated under 498A (IPC) and other sections, men and their families go through unthinkable shame and torture. Imagine, every family member is busy defending themselves and proving their innocence because a scorned spouse has invoked the law against them falsely. They barely have time to attend jobs, run business or even live life. The humiliation ki inki bahu ne inn pe rape ka ya dahej ka mukadma kar rakha hai, is also unbearable. The law must be reconsidered, and provisions for speedy and just trials should be considered otherwise, men will continue to die for no fault of their own. These marital laws have become tools of extortion and harassment,” says Bhardwaj

A template for torture

“Most advocates have a template ready and they change the names of the complainant and accused. To give you just one example, I know of this advocate who was scolded by the judge because that day he had four divorce cases in the family court and all four complaints said, ‘My father-in-law spat on me, my devar (brother-in-law) pinched me, my sister-in-law pulled my hair and my mother-in-law slapped me’. The judge scolded the advocate, but imagine how easy it is to implicate someone ,” Krishna shares.

Breaking the silence: Men rights matter, men lives matter

Section 498A (IPC) was framed to protect women against atrocities by in-laws. However, the recent suicides where men have left suicide notes recounting their ordeal blaming the misuse of these laws by their estranged wives highlight a deeper problem — frivolous use of these serious criminal laws to settle marital disputes with little room for men to narrate their own tales of harassment.

There is definitely room for modifying the procedure and law to ensure justice is gender-neutral.

Fair investigation procedures: The legal system must ensure that every complaint under Section 498A (IPC) is thoroughly investigated before making arrests and entertaining complaints of such serious nature.

Gender-neutral laws: “Laws addressing domestic abuse and marital discord should be gender-neutral, ensuring that men are also protected from harassment and false accusations,” suggests Bhardwaj.

Psychological support and counselling: “Men find it difficult to open up about their emotions and seek support. In most marital disputes, they also blame themselves for their family’s misery. They think, ‘If I die, the hurt and humiliation everyone is going through because of me will end, too.’ Establishing helplines and counselling centres, specifically for men can provide them with the mental health support they desperately need. If Atul Subhash had got timely psychological help, he might be with us today,” says Delhi-based psychologist Poonam Sharma.

Penalty and punishment for false cases: “Women who file false dowry cases should face legal consequences. This will ensure that genuine cases receive the attention they deserve. Right now the penalty even for false rape case is just a fine of ₹500 in Gurugram courts; in Delhi it is nothing. That says a lot about how easy it is to make a man’s life unimaginably difficult,” says Krishna.

Sensitisation: “The first responders are police personnel. And right now, most of the staff at the police station is rude, they abuse and scare the accused even before the investigation has begun. It is important that they are sensitised. Society must recognise that men, too, can be victims of marital abuse and domestic violence. Sensitisation programmes for law enforcement, judiciary, and the general public are needed,” says Bhardwaj.

Timely conclusion: Such cases should be tried at fast track courts for expeditious trial and justice. Otherwise, innocent men suffer for years. And if the men are guilty, women get justice very late.

A call for action: Bipin Modi, Atul Subhash’s younger brother

Bipin Modi, younger brother of Atul Subhash, has started a movement for men’s rights in India. He says, “I will fight until Atul and every man in the country gets justice. We are organising a satyagrah for men’s rights on April 19, 2025, at Jantar Mantar, Delhi. I request everyone to please join the cause. We request authorities to let men also breathe and live in this country. We are demanding that laws be made more just for all,” says Modi.

Helpline numbers:

If you or anyone you know is fighting a similar battle, please seek help. Here are some foundations and organisations you could approach:

Ekam Nyaay Foundation is an NGO founded by equal rights activist Deepika Narayan Bhardwaj. Reach out to them at: ContactUs@ekamnyaay.org

National Legal Services Authority, constituted under the Legal Services Authorities Act, 1987, provides free legal services to the weaker sections of society. Contact: 15100

AASRA provides free and confidential support for people in distress or feeling suicidal. Contact: +91-9820466726

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